I’m all growns UP.

I’m trying to get fancy in my old age.  Meaning I’m trying to buy fancier clothes, fancier glasses, and fancier shoes.  I’m even trying to eat fancier (this really just means healthier, but fancier sounds fancier) and make my bod fancier by working it into a tall sweaty mess.  I want to wear dresses around the house and keep my bedroom clean.  I want to cook more meals while wearing my fancy apron and try more recipes.  I want my house to smell fancy, like Anthropologie.

***Side note.  I went there for the first time last Friday and LOOOOOVED it!!  It is partly responsible for this fancy obsession.  They even have fancy furniture to sit on and fancy bags to pack your overly expensive treasures in.***

So, while I was at Nordstroms (Target) shopping for my fancy every day items (toothpaste and candy) , I stumbled…upon these great looking shoes.

Now I have a pretty small collection of foot ware.  I generally wear flats or boots because I am so freakishly tall with anything more than a zero inch heel.  But because I was feeling fancy, I tried on some wedges that immediately rose me to a comfortable height of about 6’2″.  Is it normal that I can now see the dust on the tops of shelves and the cashier’s hair all the way down at the other end of the store?  I dunno.  I have some tall friends who rock a 3 or 4 inch heel daily and I  have been told by others that us amazonian women SHOULD rock a high heel with pride, cuz by golly…it’s fancy.  I bought them and now own a total of 2 pairs of high heels. Pretty Fancy!!

I’m sure you’re probably thinking by the picture that these shoes are super easy to walk in.  Well, I lied to myself while walking up and down the carpeted runway in the shoe section.  I hate being restricted to taking baby steps because of the durn price tags, but  I said, “oh yeah, I could do this.”  pshhh.  Dream on lady.  Later that night, the shoes that I stumbled upon, I would literally stumble on.

Matthew and I were invited to a party celebrating the end of summer with some of his work friends.  We showed up all super cute and fancy and brought the best taco dip ever.  I mean, anything that has an entire 8 ounce of cream cheese in it, is fancy in my book.  The couple who was throwing the party has this adorable apartment with a crazy cool rooftop “patio” area right outside their living room windows.  Yes, the only way to get out there was to climb.  That wasn’t even the hard part.  Apparently when you wear 4 inch heels for the first time EVER and think you can handle just standing around talking to strangers and trying to look hip and fancy in your fancy shoes, you fall over like a tree on chopping day.  T I M B E R!!!!  Excuse me, man I am speaking to for the first time ever.  Do you mind if i spill my drink all over you, fall so awkwardly that I need help getting up and then be so cool about it that my audience is feeling like they should have paid for this show?  Nice to meet you. I’m Fancy Brita.  Shows over people!  This literally all happened within the first eh…..20 minutes of being surrounded by strangers.  I love to make an impression.

I found this video online that made me feel a little better about myself.  I needed a little pick me up so I wouldn’t be scared to try my fancy shoes again.

bahahahahahahaha!!  Maybe I laughed out loud the entire time while watching this video because I can relate to their wabble…in their ankles that is.  See Brita.  Even models don’t know how to gracefully preside over an audience of strangers.

So, in my pursuit to being fancy, I discovered that wearing high heels takes practice.  Don’t think you can rock 4 inch wedges like a G if your ankles are weak and you normally wear flats or plushy slippers.  C’mon.  Maybe if you weren’t tryin to be so fancy…

 

Do you like to rock high heels?  Got any TIMBER stories?